Greetings brothers and sisters of Planet Earth! The Mozrian Saucer Armada pulled into a club on the not-so outer-ring of Saturn. I thought the rave on Pluto last night would have shut these guys and green girls down – but if there’s anything I can report with any certainty to all of you who are scared that aliens are gonna blow you up – it’s that aliens are way too distracted getting their club on to worry about a full-scale invasion.
There's a reason Space-Aliens abducted Randy Quaid.
It’s seriously like you dropped a Kardashian into a shoe store and told her there was a free E! Channel Wedding Coupon hiding in one of the boxes of Jimmy Choo’s – the party is kicking until someone is stumbling out with a new financee and a fancy pair of strappy heels.
Now's your chance, dude - her Fiiii - Ance left her!
So anyway, club life in the outer cosmos doesn’t look like it’s stoppin’ anytime soon. Meanwhile, while I’m out here trying to get alien girls to notice me – which is a whole set of problems beyond getting regular girls to notice me – back on Earth a lot of people have downloaded their FREE Kindle copy of Billy Purgatory: I am the Devil Bird. People seem to really be into the idea of checking out what Billy Purgatory is all about + they seem to like getting stuff free too – it’s my pleasure to provide both of these things to anyone who wants them.
Billy Purgatory cover art by the amazing Thomas Boatwright!
A writer who I follow on Twitter by the name of Tim Queeney – who wrote some really cool books that I like, George In London & The SHIVA Compression + runs a really funny site called Height of Eye, was nice enough to read Billy Purgatory and write up a review. I guess I’m never really prepared fully for people to like the book enough to write a review, much less say stuff like this:
The first few pages of Billy Purgatory seal the deal. You quickly realize that this is no ordinary skatekid, vampire, monster, devil bird book. Billy Purgatory is a phantasmagorical thrill ride into a world of teenage love, blood dripping undead and one of the most outrageously entertaining birth scenes ever written. More than merely a humorous, stylish foray into the horror genre, however, this book also resonates with themes of love, loss and acceptance of the way that life can hold us back, even break us. The last thing you might expect about so entertaining and imaginative a book like this is how touching and ultimately true it is. If there is something about Billy Purgatory that might not work for some readers, it might be the book’s episodic/dreamlike structure that doesn’t move like a standard linear plot. But that shouldn’t stop anyone from grabbing a copy of Billy and going for a wild ride!
The fact he’s a fellow author who I respect and am a fan of just makes it all better.
Billy Purgatory is still bouncing around the Top Ten on Kindle’s Contemporary Fantasy list (#6 last time I checked) and it’s still FREE and I’d love for you to get yourself a copy and I’d love even more to hear what you think about it. When I get back to Earth, I’m probably gonna charge money for it (if I’m not too hung over from all these future drinks to remember to change the price).
Click for Time Zombie Transportation!
Author Jesse James Freeman delivers a comic book for the ages in novel form with this wild, tongue-in-cheek, imaginative creation that will suspend your disbelief. Jump in if you’re looking to immerse yourself in a unique and original fantasy tale with a sick twist….Billy dares you to join him.
Other Earth-Badassary News that I heard about today (via Space-Twitter)…
Author R.B. Wood has re-launched his outstanding novel The Prodigal’s Foole today!
Check out this smoking hot cover – it’s sweeter than space-love!
Patricia Tallman, from Babylon 5 gave him an even sweeter cover blurb: “GREAT RIDE! Loved reading it. Couldn’t put it down!”
Classy hot space lady! Patricia Tallman, you're doing it right *sigh*
The Prodigal's Foole is FREE for a limited time for you to grab up too! Click!
A man can run from his past … but not his future.
Symon Bryson lives in self-imposed exile until Monsignor DuBarry goes missing and not even the most adept of the magic practitioners can determine the reason for the abduction. The clues lie buried in the past amidst epic battles and horrific losses but reliving that failed mission uncovers fresh challenges and fearsome threats that reunite his old team.
Symon must deal with his own hidden demons and confront the menace that threatens the delicate balance of power. When the darkest of all evils lures Symon into springing a long-planned trap, an unsuspecting world will confront the unthinkable.
When all that stands between Heaven and Hell is magic, more than faith will be tested.
Check out Tim Queeney too!
Click on George!
“George in London is funny and a touch irreverent, a fun voyage which, if it didn’t happen, we should wish it did. Tim Queeney captures the spirit of the young Washington and surrounds him with a cast of compelling characters, foremost among them the indomitable Darius Attucks. And if the personal history is made up, the social history is spot on. The customs, speech and eighteenth century settings are rendered with well-researched accuracy. For readers who might like their history leavened with humor, this book is for you.”
-James L. Nelson, author of the books, “George Washington’s Secret Navy: How the American Revolution Went to Sea” (McGraw Hill); “George Washington’s Great Gamble: And the Sea Battle That Won the American Revolution” (Ragged Mountain Press) and “With Fire and Sword: The Battle of Bunker Hill and the Beginning of the American Revolution” (Thomas Dunne Books).
Click the Missile!
The ultimate doomsday weapon: The top secret SHIVA Compression virus can automatically launch all U.S. nuclear missiles. Once released onto the nation’s communications networks, SHIVA cannot be turned off.
Air Force Lieutenant Perry Helion stumbles across a twisted cult that seeks to use SHIVA to produce an orgy of destruction. Perry and his team have only a few days to somehow stop the SHIVA virus from burrowing into the launch computers at every Minuteman missile base and sending the nuclear warheads arcing skyward to an all-consuming firestorm.
